dearly beloved, are you listening

Oh, how it's been so long

2009-06-11T01:10:51Z

I'm starting to think I forget this place more than it is intended....

But as well as a personal journal from time to time, I will now also be using this place for my fan fiction when I get around to typing it all up and whatnot.

Should you be scared....yes...

But here I am, remembering that LJ exists for more than just me lurking at all the other fan fiction out there: my head gets creative too.

With much love,
Scarlet M

Writer's Block: Divided Self

2009-03-19T05:40:15Z

Do you behave differently online than you do in real life?

Submitted By tinysaur

View 500 Answers

Mmm, I'm much less mobile than I am in real life. I don't know. I tend to be just as snarky as I am in real life, but I'm also a little more outgoing on the internet.

midnightsugar @ 2008-11-03T18:56:00

2008-11-03T07:56:55Z

For the first time ever, I've ended up failing at something that should have been easy and decided to take the easy way out and give up and throw in the course that I'm doing so close to the end.

It wasn't a decision I made lightly or with a great amount of happiness, but I know this is the best thing for me, and I know the feeling of failure won't stay with me. I thought that at 22 years of age, I'd have my life pretty much sorted out about what I wanted to do, and I don't...It's scary and confusing, but I know that I WILL have it figured out soon enough.

For those that have been waiting an update with my PATD slash story, "There's Something In The Water", it will be finished by the beginning of December because I've put it off to concentrate on a subject that bored me to tears and sent me into a panic attack.

Tomorrow is the first day of the newest chapter of my life. I'll be letting people down, but I've done too much that was for other people and I need to move on to do someting for myself.

My friends are my lifeline and I can't thank whatever entity is up there enough for them.

All aboard the life changer train....

the moral of this story is....

2008-08-13T11:52:42Z

God, I'm so stupid lol

I haven't updated my fic in weeks, and for that I apologise. I haven't had the writing bug for a while but I hope to have another chapter up soon.

I've been so busy. TAFE, looking for work, seeing my dad, trying to forgive people(and not having it work out quite like I hoped) and just having a big mess in my head.

I used to be so organised with everything.

I used to have motivation.

I dream far too much...

I miss being a child...

So? The moral of this post? There isn't one. I'm just venting...

But on the bright side...
Happy birthday! Not to me. But you know who you are gorgeous girl =) I hope you had a wonderful day <3

Writer's Block: Birthmarks, rebirthmarks, etc.

2008-07-09T06:03:37Z

What kind of birthmark do you have? How does it look? If you don't have one already, what kind of birthmark would you like to have?

Submitted By her_inanition

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I have a birthmark on my neck that looks like a faded hickey lol...I love how everyone looks at it and don't believe me when I first tell them it's NOT a hickey.

midnightsugar @ 2008-06-07T23:37:00

2008-06-07T14:05:21Z

Continued on from boi4eliza

1. Leave me a comment asking for questions.
2. I'll respond by asking you five personal questions so that I can get to know you better.
3. You can update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. You can include this explanation and offer to ask someone else in the post.
5. When others comment asking to be asked, you can ask them five questions.

1. Who is the other woman you would give up dudes for?!

Cristina Scabbia from Lacuna Coil. No question. I will die if I ever get to meet her lol. Or try and get her to fall in love with me hahaha

2. If you could dedicate any song in the world to anybody you want, what song would you choose, and who would you dedicate it to?

God...um...this is definitely not easy. 'Black and White' by Michael Jackson. To my mother, who I know loved him. Because I remember listening to it when I was younger and she played it in the house constantly.

3. If you had the power to make any famous person not famous anymore, who would you use your power on and why?

Paris Hilton. Because I have absolutely no respect for that woman whatsoever. As far as I'm concerned, she hasn't done anything to be as famous as she is. Even her sister actually works. 'The Simple Life' doesn't count

4. You can sleep with any boy on the FBR label for one night, who do you choose and list the order of events?

JON WALKER!!!!!! Haha the events...oh yeah...this is gonna be nice and embarrassing lol. I would get absolutely drunk out of my mind with him first lol. God knows what can happen from there lol. Even I wouldn't be sure what I could say yes to haha. There's going to be nakedness, quite possibly more alcohol while there's nakedness. And I may or may not care if there was a camera involved lol. And then I would shave off his beard for funsies while he slept, but insist he grow it back because he does look hot with it lol. And then I may or may not have a baby nine months later ;)

5. Someone is threatening to trash your CD rack, which album do you save first? Green Day-Warning. It's my fave album of theirs. It has my fave song, but I would cry if any of the others got wrecked

Writer's Block: The Only True Question:

2008-05-30T10:24:19Z

If you could go back and fix your most regrettable decision, what would it be, and what would you do differently?

Or:

Pirates or Ninjas?

View 501 Answers

Oh my God! Don't ask me this...I love both...

Ok, fine fine...if I've gotta choose one, I'll go with ninjas. I admire stealth like that lol

Let's play pretend.

2008-05-27T10:48:51Z

I am still writing There's Something in the Water...and it is being a bitch lol. Even though I have the chapters planned out, it's not really writing itself as easily as I was hoping...

And the sequel isn't being easy either...

Let's hope I don't burn out haha.

Knitting is helping. And I'm talking to my friends a lot more these days.

It feels nice to be free =)

Writer's Block: Remembering mom

2008-05-11T08:13:05Z

What's your favorite memory of your mother?

View 500 Answers

When my mother was dancing around the house to Kylie Minogue...the few times that I made her smile, and when she came back from the Phillippines just before she passed away because she looked so beautiful...

I miss her so much still, 7 years later. I still believe she's watching over me and my brothers and sister...<3

Writer's Block: Scaredy cat

2008-05-10T13:21:09Z

What animal frightens you most, and why?

View 500 Answers

Spiders....people keep telling me that they are more afraid of us than we should be of them, but I live in the country where 2 of the most poisonous ones exist, so I know it is a lie. I don't have any freaking venom to defend myself with. And every time I see one, my skin crawls and I am paranoid for days on end...

Writer's Block: Step into My Closet

2008-05-08T17:16:33Z

How many pair of shoes do you have? Out of those pairs, how many do you wear more than a few times a year?

View 501 Answers

I own 35 pairs of shoes. About 12 I have put away for good and will give to charity shortly when I do a clean out of my things soon. I am however, a Converse Chuck Taylor whore lol and currently own 9 pairs, all which I love and I will get more. I have work shoes, joggers, classic heels and 2 pairs of Colorados...

this is me...appreciating Spencer Smith...

2008-05-07T14:55:01Z

Ok, so technically, where I am, it isn't the 7th anymore, but I know that somewhere it still is and I haven't been able to get onto LJ at all today and I got home pretty late....but....

I have not forgotten that today is Spencer Smith Appreciation Day....and I would like to take the time to explain why I appreciate him :)

1. He is Spencer Smith....is that not reason enough for you people? Lol

2. I named my budgie after him, and although my bird is a girl, she is gorgeous and actually seems to have perfected a 'bitchface'...which is often directed at me haha

3. Drummers sit in the 'background', but frankly, this one takes the stage and definitely makes his presence known...

4. Awesome beard, love

5. The man is younger than me and has been involved in two very successful albums....way to make me feel old and a failure Spencer lol

6. The guy has been with his girlfriend forever, so you just know he's the sweetest guy ever...

7. It's SPENCER SMITH....why am I still explaining this?

8. Ok, so I think Jon Walker is the hottie in PATD for me, but Spencer...giving him a run for his money lol...

9. Joncer...oh my god...my fave fic pairing...like, EVER...they are just way too gorgeous together for words...

10...guys, seriously....again? It is Spencer Smith

Now....appreciate him too!

oxoxox

Are we, we are, the waiting unknown...

2008-05-01T12:49:38Z

Hahaha to trying to fix our flights from Melbourne...
Jetstar suck...
Panic take too much of my money.

Knitting WAS keeping me calm...now I want to use a different kind of wool...yeah, random lol...

The 'care package' lolz...is a big secret...it is still a secret to me lol...but it is exciting.

And Spencer keeps talking to herself lol. Such a cutie my bird is...even if she hates me. Has now perfected the bitch face. I love her hahaha

Writer's Block: Back in Time

2008-04-16T09:45:58Z

If you could travel in time, which era would you visit and why?

View 501 Answers

I would love to go back into the 60's....because I LOVE the fashion of that day, and the music....
And because things seem like it would have been more fun and more simpler

Writer's Block: Dream Job

2008-04-14T13:01:54Z

What's keeping you from your dream job?

View 501 Answers

Lack of money and qualifications....I am not giving up hope though

eh.....

2008-04-08T01:32:23Z

Still sick...joy....

But I am watching my The Living End DVD, so I am happy....

And my new birdy is home...Spencer is so cute, but a little odd...oh, Spencer is a she lol...and yes, is named after the drummer from PATD, not cos I think he is girly in any way lol, I just thought the name suited the look of my bird.

I also have dark chocolate, mmmm.....my friends rock. I can finaly eat the choc they all bought for me for Easter. Now that I am free from the death pit of Easter Show duties haha...

And massive LOLZ to the dramas of ticket buying yesterday morning....lol, lol, lol...ok done now

oxoxoxox

the early bird gets no sleep, and she doesn't like worms anyway

2008-03-22T21:07:18Z

Ok, so it's 8am in the morning, Easter Sunday.
I've been awake for more than 3 hours, and I'm finally on the 2nd train to get to work today...

Here's the kicker:
I forgot my wallet today. Which means, I don't get to eat until I get back home in 11 hours and my train ticket is in there so if I am asked for my ticket, I am in trouble...

And, I have no music to listen to....

Poop on a stick....

times like this....

2008-03-16T00:55:55Z

Ok so today I'm hitting the beach and going to be an awesome listener and friend to someone I care about who's had bad news.

Also, to those I'm being a beta for, have no fear, I'll be working for 2 weeks over Easter at the Sydney Royal Easter Show this year selling showbags(chocolate ones mind you lol, so hopefully I can contain myself haha), but I will still definitely find the time to be a beta because I love doing it for you guys.

Also, I'm currently having writer's block for my current fic. I've kind of made it really weird in the sense that I'm going to have to write another story to it...I'd explain more, but even to me its kinda hard to explain lol...

Anywho, hope everyone is having a good weekend. oxoxoxox

putting my thinking cap on...

2008-03-09T00:36:31Z

Ok,so I've finally had the inspiration and motivation to start a new fanfiction again that's not a co-write with my best friend. My last fanfic by myself though,took two years to finish and publish so this time I'm going to write as much as I can before starting to post it on LJ...

I'm also branching out. A completely different direction this time. I'm actually doing slash lol. I haven't done that in a very, very long time so it's gonna be a good challenge for me...

Death to the non-music of the music world

2008-02-22T05:42:39Z

Ok, so I understand the merch thing...I even understand the tickets getting more expensive as they get bigger thing...What the freaking hell I don't understand is why fan clubs even exist?

Yes, I'm part of a few, but they've brought me nothing but...nothing really....

Why should people be considered better just because they're part of a fan club? I don't feel any special. I feel ripped off....I barely have the money or the means to be able to listen to awesome music, but I have to feel like I'm not a TRUE fan just because I didn't get to something fast enough or becasue i actually care about the bloody music, not always thinking how freaking hot the band is.

So here's the thing. I LOVE Green Day. So why am I not part of their fan club? Because I'm no better than anyone there. I've loved Green Day since I was 12 years old. I have a life...I can't be expected to know what goes on in the lives of people I'm never going to meet. I appreciate them for their ability to make good music. I hear them out....I love THEM as a whole(and OK, YES, I do find some hot), but I'm not special. So why should I spend money I don't have for that? To say I'm an OFFICIAL fan? I'm a fan, and if those bands can't see that they have other fans like me out there, they don't deserve them. A fan club isn't giving back to the fans, no matter what they say....

But I'll probably end up joining more later on....sad....

so a funny thing happened today...

2008-02-17T08:19:25Z

This day holds a lot of meaning for me....

7 years ago,my mother passed away

Billie Joe Armstrong celebrates his birthday on this date,and he's one of my biggest musical heroes,if not my top one..

So today on top of the mixed feelings I have....one of my teeth decide to crack and a piece come out. A massive piece of tooth has just come out of my mouth....

And I have an early job interview tomorrow. I don't freaking know what to do, I don't have money for the dentist and damn if I know what caused it...

Today, of all days....honestly...

A day trip to Sydney is the equal to a journey of self discovery...

2008-02-15T12:13:47Z

Alright then, you wanna know what I learned about myself today?

I hate being in 'Proffesional/businesslike' clothing. I felt like an incredible douchebag... I had an interview today in Sydney. I get to go back for a second one on Monday. At 8:30am. AM! That means I have to get up at 4am...don't ask...it just takes forever on the train to get to sydney...
I hate high heels now. I hate not wearing my 'uniform'. I was craving it so badly today. Jeans, tee and Chucks. My lifeline lol...and if I get this job....those things will become a luxury. As will my time...
I <3 cute things. I have a sad, sad weakness for Elmo...I can't give that up lol...
And damn it, I WILL keep up to date on all the awesome stories on LJ...

There's my rant...

Wish me luck for the 2nd job interview...good or bad,whichever suits you lol

with love...

2008-02-03T10:43:47Z

Went to the hilary duff concert last night...
Im not a huge fan but hey, a gig is a gig...it wasn't that bad but I really haven't changed my mind about her...

Spice girls have cancelled their oz gig as well as a few more. Whatever, if they wanna screw us around we can deal. They can just forget about me having any respect for them now.

oh woe is me....nah im ok

2008-01-31T13:37:30Z

So im sitting here in my room wondering what it is im supposed to be doing with my life
Its after midnight,why am I still contemplating? Because I feel like a little like I don't seem to have a purpose in this life. I have dreams about what I want to do, but my dreams also have the crappy bit of needing money and experience, neither of which I don't have right now.
Id like to get a new job soon, so I can start actually saving for things. Wish me luck...
In the meantime, my friends and fanfiction are the only things keeping me grounded right now. Im loving reading again. It feels like forever since I was able to sit and read good stories, especially slash...I've also just offered my services as a beta reader. I've never actually betaed for anyone before, but I would like to stress that im quite good at grammer and spelling and I tend to have a keen eye for it. Also,im nice and don't make people feel bad about the mistakes they've made lol. And I think it's a great way for me to read even more things.
And I've found that LJ has great fics to read...so yay for me lol. My old LJ account is in the process of being deleted because I wanted a fresh start. I hope this one turns out well.
So, until next time....

freedom of first flight

2008-01-30T07:16:43Z

My first post on my new account...
Im eating delictable rocky road cookies and sweating far too much after walking home lol.
Pretty much had a P!ATD day lol. Just chock full of 'em lol...
Overall,pretty good(not odd,sorry) day.
Will hopefully be posting stuff soon on here,cos I am honestly wanting to write again...

Till next time.....